journal: 8th January 2004 - Theory of Relativity

I've always wondered whether anyone can truly tell me that they understand or can relate to what i feel right now. I could be happy...sad...in love...angry...jealous...but my definition of these emotions differ from others. It’s easy for one to say that he/she understands how someone feels but how many people can truly relate? Emotions are so subjective. It’s something personal and each individual has a different opinion and a different perspective on emotions.

I can describe my emotions with words. I am angry. I am sad. I am in love. I am truly happy. But in reality, they’re just words. No one would truly know the meaning of my words unless they were in my shoes. This led me to wonder about Einstein’s theory of relativity. Einstein once said “Put your hand on a hot stove for one minute and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour and it feels like a minute.” Basically he’s trying to say that the states of our emotions are solely dependent on the significance or existence of another.

I’m not going to try and dissect Einstein’s theory of relativity. Neither am I here to discuss its roots or its scientific importance. I’m just wondering, can anyone truly relate to how we feel? We all use the same words to describe our emotions. Some of us handle our adversities better than others. Does that mean they feel less? There is no way of measuring our emotions on a scale or weighing it using a metric unit.

It is said that the females’ threshold of physical pain is 9 times that of males. Emotional pain is slightly different. There is no scientific proof that states that the threshold of emotional pain differs according to gender. No two people are similar and therefore, nobody can logically say, “I know exactly how you feel” and actually mean it. If someone broke up with me and was able to move on like nothing ever happened the next day... it doesn’t mean that he didn’t care. I can try and rationalize that by saying that I felt more and gave more into the relationship than he did but that would only be unfair. I cannot say that he loved me more but on the other hand, I cannot say he loved me less. I can’t even say that we loved each other equally as much. Why? There is no way I can measure or compare his emotions with mine.

The common misconception lies in the fact that women would like to believe that men recover from relationships faster as compared to them. It’s easy to dispel them as being emotionally detached but the truth is we have no idea what goes on in their hearts and minds. Once again, men can describe their emotions with words just as we do. But the fact is, it’s just words. Nobody really knows what they mean except for the individual who uttered those words. Men could be capable of controlling their thoughts and emotions but it’s unfair for us to stereotype them as being less emotional compared to us.

So the question still remains. How do we measure the depth of emotions? The answer, we can’t. We can try to dissect it, we can question it but we will never know for sure. All we can do is give others the benefit of the doubt and just believe.