music is my life

i haven't touched the piano in ages. why?

- i don't teach anymore
- my fingernails are too long
- nothing interesting to play

its been a year since i've attempted to play anything properly. and i've pretty much lost it. i find that i'm struggling with the flow of things. my hands are stiff...my fingers are not as quick as they used to be...and i'm just missing my aim on my notes. my touch is completely off so everything sounds horrendous. so today...i have decided to cut my nails...really short. i'm going to start practicing since i managed to find myself a copy of the Pride and Prejudice score. and i'm going to get back on track. can't let it go to waste. ugh...can't imagine myself practicing my scales and arpeggios...but i am determined. there's no excuse.

someone once said that you won't know that you love someone until you lose them. well...i guess it applies to many things. never realized how important it was for me to play the piano until now...when i'm on the verge of losing it. i feel sooooo guilty now.