Monday, July 17, 2006

the politically correct amazing race

trust the amazing race to try and be politically correct. the 10th season of the amazing race will feature a gay couple (as they always do)...a pair of male models (so predictable)...a pair of girlfriends (which are probably hot)...a pair of em-Miss USA contestants (to increase viewership)...and get this...the first ever INDIAN-American team and the first ever MUSLIM team. and the newspaper article had to highlight the MUSLIM team just in case we couldn't read the print. so what? america goes to war with the middle east...and muslims around the world i might add...and now you're using them as a selling point? but to be fair...they did mention the gay team and the indian-american team. they didn't mention the amputee and the open lesbian though.

how to conduct your very own money making scam:-

step 1: print out a hundred coupons like so (forgive the poor illustration)

step 2: create another set of lucky draw coupons like so

step 3: find a place to prey on innocent and naive people. preferably some place where these money making scams are still a myth. some suggestions include pleasantville and neverland. pot yourself there until you find an unwitting target.

step 4: make up a story. something along the lines of "Congratulations! you've been chosen to be the winner of our 10th anniversary (always give a big number. 1st anniversary isn't very convincing or reassuring) lucky draw. there's RM1,000,000 in cash and prizes to give away. so far, we've given away 15 OSIM chairs, 10 round trip tickets to Paris, RM250,000 cash. the only prizes left are 5 perdana v6's and 1 blender. your chances are 5 out of 6 to win a perdana. good odds no? let me bring you to my office where you have to put down a RM10,000 down payment for the perdana v6. if you get the perdana v6, we will pay for the remaining value. if you get the blender...we keep the down payment and you go home with *drum roll please*....a BLENDER!. but you see ah...your chances are 5 out of 6. very good odds. better to take the risk. if not you'll never know whether you COULD'VE won yourself a brand new perdana v6."

step 5: make sure you collect the RM10,000 down payment before letting the target dig into the lucky draw jar. upon collecting the payment...allow the target to select a coupon from the lucky draw jar.

by the way...if you're not sure how the mechanics of this scam works...you shouldn't be conducting your own money making scam. just remember to fill the jar with BLENDER COUPONS only. be more creative and come up with your own twist to the scam. this is just an outline.

*note* please draft out a legal document exempting you from any liability for any damages caused whether it be psychological or financial.

happy hunting :)