journal: 10th December 2003 - bad rep

on my way to work today...while i was stuck in a massive traffic jam along jalan damansara...i managed to catch a radio show of this guy i once met. he was discussing the topic of how women misinterpret certain innocent things that men say. some of the examples are....

guy says: your friend is nice
girl interprets: your friend is hot and i'd like to get me some of that

guy says: are you going to change before we go out?
girl interprets: are you going to wear that 'ugly' thing out?

guy says: want to go to the gym and work out with me?
girl interprets: want to go to the gym and lose that spare tyre of yours as well as tone up those flabby thighs of yours?

i wouldn't disagree with him completely. i personally know some girls who do misinterpret certain things but i think it's unfair for guys to generalize girls as being so. girls are not that predictable....are we? anyway....it just got me to thinking about certain gender generalizations. girls like to gossip....girls like to shop....girls spend hours getting ready for a night out in town. guys are egoistic....guys are stubborn...guys are strong. but i know girls who are egoistic...stubborn and strong and i know guys who like to gossip...shop...and takes hours to get ready to go clubbing. so maybe there are exceptions to the rule.

someone once told me that men only need a few words to hold a conversation and women need a few paragraphs to say 'hi...how are you?'. i believe that we don't misintepret things. we dissect them and therefore we come off as we're being doubtful of its sincerity or its honesty. for example....if someone tells a girl 'i like what you're wearing'....these are a few things would run through her mind...

- are you serious or just being polite?
- was it meant to be sarcastic?
- i hope she doesn't go out and buy the same thing that i'm wearing
- my outfit must be terrible cause they've got terrible fashion sense

this is what runs through a guys mind...

- god damn i'm hot!!!

basically....guys take things at face value. they don't dissect...they don't criticise...and they hardly judge. girls on the other hand would do all of the above. it's harmful and sometimes it can be fun but we've gotten a bad rep because of it.

so it got me to thinking again....are we that bad? and if so...why do men still put up with us? if i hear a guy talking about a girl it could be either one of two things. either the girl is hot or they're complaining about them. it was then that i had an epiphany. maybe guys prefer to look at the bad instead of the good. they complain about the bad things in girls instead of appreciating the good stuff. maybe they just like to pick on the negatives.

so i guess the conclusion is that we all have our flaws and shortcomings. it would be nice if it was a well kept secret but i guess the bubble has popped. we still have to co-exist in order to pro-create. so i guess in the name of pro-creation we'll just have to accept things as they are and live with it.