i was having a discussion with my dad about the article below and it got me to thinking....

my grandparents were subjected to an arranged marriage. seems like a long time ago that arranged marriages were the norm but it seems like its making a comeback....with a twist of course. nowadays it's more of business deal...part of the import and export industry. why are we going backwards and not forward?

my dad said "people spend most of their time falling in love before marriage and falling out of love after marriage". my grandparents were one of the lucky ones who actually benefited from an arranged marriage and they were happy. people who get married in the name of love sometimes suffer a worse fate. look at my parents....my dads been cheating on my mom even before they got married and has 4 children out of wedlock that we know about. who knows how many more there are out there? loyalty and honesty aren't exactly traits that my dad possesses when it comes to marriage. but i do believe that he thought and still thinks that he's doing the right thing and that he kept it a secret for so long for a reason. might not have been the best thing to do but i'm sure he felt it was at that time.

anyway...we discussed the whole idea of "settling"...which is what most people seem to be doing now. people always have an ideal...a prince charming...a sleeping beauty...a fairy tale ending. but what happens when time seems to be running out and the fairy tale ending seems like nothing more than just a fairy tale....a story that we've been programmed to believe. they settle for the next best thing. the idea of love is thrown out the window and what's left is just companionship. someone to just be there...someone to tend to the house...someone accommodating as they would put it. the search for love is called off and that's when things become pathetic and desperate.

some would say that time is running out and that its now or never. just grab the first willing candidate and be done with it. the whole fascination and obssession with marriage amazes me. and its the obssession that leads to desperation. it becomes a race to just fill up the empty spaces.

but hey...a 52 year old bachelor told me..."how would you know that they won't be happy?" i honestly won't know. so if mail order brides is what makes men happy...i guess it's not my place to discourage it.